How not to write...

     Moonlight Forum   

Click here to edit subtitle

Trollfics Galore

The Trollfics you're about to read are some of the worse. They are really offensive. If you don't like that type of stuff, turn the other way. The authors themselves are unknown, so if you get angry at what you read, punch a tree or something.

If anyone has a trollfic they want to submit, please email me a copy of it to

Jo Bel

Sadly no one told this poor girl the Civil War had ended.... 150 years ago. Some of the most racist work ever written. You could take her seriously if it wasn't for the god awful spelling. At no point does she spell anything right. If you can get through this without getting a headache then you're simply awesome. Hey, she even misspells the word 'I'.

Plotline wise.... there isn't any plotline. It basically some racist girl named Jo Bekke who some how manages to get accepted into Hogwarts [they accept Goffs why am I question troll-logic] and goes about terrorizing everyone. Dumbledore, Harry, and the rest of the gang becomes a personal cheerleading for Jo Bekke. And we never found out what Hermonie's secret was...

Tara Gilesbie

I doubt this author really needs an introduction. He or she [depending on whether you believe that myths or not] is considered the most famous fanfiction author ever. No one else has had such an influence on this genre [maybe besides the Star Trek  fanfic founders]. This fanfics has many greate on liners, such as: "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!", "Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time", "Voldemort got a dude-ur-so-retarded look on his face", "You ludacris fools!", "Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?" and "I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT... BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!". Seriously, I could go on all day talking about this work of art. But instead I'll get you to read it yourself. Trust me, this'll be the funniest shit you'll ever read.

According so the myth, the author of My Immortal turned out to be a guy named Todd who lives in Australia. This could be true or he could be an attention seeker. Nonetheless, he's the closest we've got to the real identity of this author. He has a lot of proof backing his claims up. His FFN account is friends with the original author and his style of writing is similiar to the original author. However, I don't think we'll ever find out the truth. Any how, here are some of his fanfics.


How to discribe this guy?  TvTrope does it the best: "The best description would probably be a slightly Lighter and Softer version of Comics Nix; while his stories generally lack explicit sexual content, they're just as insane and misspelled. And if you were looking for accurate, faithful depictions of a work and its characters? Look elsewhere."

He has two types of fanfics, Sly Cooper, which are "crackfics relying mostly on Refuge in Vulgarity, including cluster F bombs, groin attacks, and Murray "Murry" being either made fun of for being "fat and retarded", brutally killed, or both", and Death Fics, which "simply titled "(character name) Dies A Horrible/Violent/Painful Death", which are the EXACT same story written line for line, only with different character names and small details pasted in. In these stories, various characters are brutally dismembered by a serial killer named Evil Inspector Andy. In the introductions, he claims that he "loves" these characters and has dolls of them that he sleeps with every night."

In other words, he's batshit crazy. He really needs to get help. He just a little bit.... special.

The Brown Family

Nope, this isn't like the Bronte Sisters. This is something much worse! The main member of this really interesting family worth mentioning is Thomas Finn Brown, the person that write's most of the fanfics in this collection. If you're religious and easiliy offended, I'd turn the other way by now. This guy's stuff is the most offensive shit you'll ever read.

To sum everything up, Tommy Boy is a fundamentalist Christian from Kansas. He's also very conservative, racist, sexist, xenophobic, and the list goes on. Here's an example from his first fanfic, the Evil Gods I: "We will corrupt the nation of God to bring everyone too hell, where they will will burn for in all eternal history, where their body will tourn apart, and spread across a endless, lifeless land, where they will be eaten by all foul breast." Yeah... I think you get my point. He also has a great sense of logic: "I and her are not dating, if you Satanic scum think that there is something Satanic going on. We are dating, but we are not having Sex until we get married."

He's work has endless ammounts of tropes. Since My Immortal, he's the only person's who's managed to make a trollfics so awful it's good. and we're not sure whether he's a troll or not. Let's pray to God he's joking. The fanfics themselves contain very little plotline... well there is a plot line, but with all the contradictions and really bad spelling errors, which leads to him saying something much ruder than intended, the plot is simply messy and confusing. Nonetheless, let the author explain: "Thank-you for clearing that up. I want to explain what this story is. In the first books in this God inspired series, a group of Christian warriors were able to convert Camp Half-Blood to Christianity. With the help of Jerry, a fellow Christian that converted the camp to Christianity, Percy Jackson and his friends were able to defeat the evil Greek Gods. After this, Michael, a fellow Prayer Warrior, turned to Hogwarts, in which they were able to defeat the evil head master Dumbledore and freed England from the grips of witchcraft. After this, Percy Jackson and Jerry went to Communist Russia, which was under control of the evil John Lennon. After John Lennon was defeated by Jerry's wife Mary, Percy Jackson left to return to Camp Half Blood, leaving Jerry to deal with the evil Stalin, which story will be told in The Prayer Warriors: The Threat of Communism. And now the second part of The Prayer Warriors: The Evil Gods, where The Prayer Warriors faces their biggest challenge yet…. THE EVIL ROMAN GODS!" Yeah, I didn't get that either. Shame this guy doesn't get more attention. Maybe that's a good thing...